if I wanted to right now i'd fucking tear you apart
twist these words into daggers stab them strait through your heart
before your eyes right now your very life should be flashin'
because we both know damn well that I'm an alliterative assassin

a reflection on what we were

somethings are beautiful because of their brevity, like the flash of a firefly or a shooting star.



....and sometimes life just pushes you in the right direction.

au revoir......this seems the only way appropriate to say goodbye to you

in the words of Dr. Cox

And BAM! the shines off the apple...

just a brief update

A poem i wrote a while ago that needed to get out and a new one i just needed to write. I'm composing a letter right now. A massive letter that is taking me days to write. it's going slowly because I'm writing it by hand, being thorough, and it's not been an easy letter to write. I have been a warrior with ink and pad.

Words for C

The days
They're slowly killing me
with their passing;
Each a day claimed his
and,
a day i failed
to summon my confession

************************************

It's knowing I have
to do this
or i could never
call myself a man.
it's the confusion
of knowing, just knowing,
but knowing,
you can't just know.
it's screaming with
wild, feral rage
because if I can't tell you
I'll make sure as hell
the night knows.
It's running through my mind
the situation, a thousand times
in the same day
when nothing,
not a single thing
has changed
It's having searched
these feelings so many
times that
I've gone numb

*******************************

I wait,
with the silent resolve
of a man whose
only hope comes
from times drift.
A bit of determination
in one hand.
A bit of destiny
the other.
I wait.

*******************************

These days,
I await their passing.
Each a day closer
to testing myself.

and knowing...

my altered john mayer lyrics

I don't think I'm gonna stay in PA anymore
I don't think I'm gonna stay in PA anymore
'cus i don't like this state much, without knocking on your door
I don't think I'm gonna stay in PA anymore

I don't think I'm gonna stay in PA anymore
I'm not sure that i ever really could
there's something about the city that never fit quite right
It's hard for me to be living without the woods

I'm gonna get out of here
I burn up in your atmosphere
I'm gonna get out of here
'cus i'd die if I saw you
but I can't live with never seeing you again.

If you could crack my heart open wide
you'd find a fortune there inside
on a little piece of paper that's folded and white
It's a message meant for you
And i swear each word is true
think i'll show it to you when i've got a little less pride



Where i go
Whatever i do
I wonder where i am in my relationship to you

Wherever you go
Wherever you are
I'll watch your life play out in pictures from afar

Wherever you go
Wherever you are
I'll watch that pretty life play out in pictures from afar