changing

ok so it has been a while since i have written anything. let me just say that the start of this school year has been an avenue into a growth in me. I have a much more open sense of the world around me. I find that i have finally overgrown the question of who i am. I can finally admit to what is true in me and what is not. it's a good feeling. I just don't care what people think of me anymore. It reminds me of the end of black swan green when Jason is finally truly himself and approaches all his life with a sort of immovable zen. It is this mental state that i am reaching now too. i am finally making myself immovable in body and mind. I care about my schooling again and am interested again as well. i am happy and social yet i feel comfortable with just myself. I have a new girl friend who i am enjoying very much. i have started to enjoy things i could not before such yoga and rap. I have a new appreciation of nature, writing, exercise, fun, and peace. I have decided that once i graduate and stick around maine for a last summer i am going to move to a new area. locations i am thinking about include but are not limited to: colorado, alaska (probably anchorage area), west coast like oregon or washington, or maybe canada. maybe i'll try something else after that too. This is a point in my life where i want to have some adventure and fun. I hope to have someone, friend or otherwise, to go on this adventure with me. i'm ready to recognize and actualize myself as an adult. I like who i have become and who i am becoming